So I am totally going to run my 1/2 marathon, I am so, eager, elated, and emotional over the whole thing. It is exactly one week to go. I am also glad this next week is going to be very busy because it will help with the nerves. I went to the temple last night and was reminded of some blessings I have specifically to "run and not be weary, and walk and not faint." (D&C 89:20)

I found a talk I gave at the Lifestyles Retreat I went to in May. I am posting it hear so I can remember it better.



I have left writing this too late I don’t know what to tell you or what to say so I will just begin with what I know. I have known some of these things my whole life and some I have learned and even some I am still learning about.

I know
That I have a heavenly Father who loves me beyond human understanding.
That I have a brother who died that I might live again.
That I am a child of God.
That I have noble birthright.
That I am a queen in training, that the blood that coursing through my body is noble.
That “if I should serve him who has created me from the beginning, and is preserving me from day to day, by lending me breath, that I may live and move and do according to my will” (Mosiah 2:21) That if I should serve him with all of my soul I would be an unprofitable servant.

I know that there was a war in heaven before I came to earth and a lot of the reason for that war was agency.
I know I was on the right side.
I know I earned the right to be on this earth and have the most precious of gifts. A physical body a “a tabernacle of flesh – a temple for my spirit.” (Elder Russell M. Nelson, You are a Child of God, July 2008)
“The body is sacred. It was created in the image of God. It is something to be cared for and used for good purposes. It ought to be taken care of…” (The body is sacred Pres. Hinckley New Era Nov. 2006)

President Hinckley said, “I marvel at the miracle of the human mind and body. Have you ever contemplated the wonders of yourself, the eyes with which you see, the ears with which you hear, the voice with which you speak? No camera ever built can compare with the human eye. No method of communication ever devised can compare with the voice and the ear. No pump ever built will run as long or as efficiently as the human heart. No computer or other creation of science can equal the human brain. What a remarkable thing you are. You can think by day and dream by night. You can speak and hear and smell. Look at your finger. The most skillful attempt to reproduce it mechanically has resulted in only a crude approximation. The next time you use your finger, watch it, look at it, and sense the wonder of it.”

When I read this I thought about my babies, I used to watch with wonder as they first discovered their hands. They would hold them at eye level and open and shut them and wiggle their fingers looking at them with a kind of wonder. Or perhaps thinking still to their unveiled spirit “I’m here I made it”.

With any gift comes the responsibility to care for and be a steward over it.

Let’s pretend for a moment I got a new calling to care for the temple building. I would consider this a huge calling; I would check and recheck systems; I would not let anything unworthy or useless enter the temple, if it did I would remove it immediately.

And yet, I have been given a “temple or tabernacle of the spirit” and I feed the systems useless things, I have not kept up the repairs as diligently as a worthy steward should. The Lord has said, “Yea, man is the tabernacle of God, even temples; and whatsoever temple is defiled, God shall destroy that temple.”(D&C 93:35) How grateful I am for the “Atonement of Jesus Christ” that even though in my own opinion I have defiled my temple I can repent I can improve I can clean out the systems “literally” I can stop letting the useless things in my temple. I am in a restoration period of my temple although I feel like I have been rededicated already.

Elder Bednar gave a Devotional Address at Rick’s College in January 2000, but it is found in the Ensign September 2001 issue it is called “Ye are the temple of God”. Now the context of his talk is concerning the use of Internet and other technological things. I would urge all to read and reread this important talk. At first he shares three reasons we came to earth to gain a physical body.

Reason no. 1. Obtaining a tabernacle of flesh is an essential step in the process of becoming like our Heavenly Father. Our physical bodies make possible a breadth, depth, and intensity of experience that simply could not be obtained in our premortal estate. As President Boyd K. Packer, acting President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, has taught, “Our physical body is the instrument of our spirit” (Let Not Your Heart Be Troubled [1991], 211). Thus, our relationships with other people, our capacity to recognize and respond to truth, and our ability to obey the principles and ordinances of the gospel of Jesus Christ are amplified through our physical bodies. In this classroom of mortality we experience tenderness, kindness, happiness, sorrow, disappointment, pain, and even the challenges of physical limitations in ways that prepare us for eternity. Simply stated, there are lessons we must learn and experiences we must have, as the scriptures describe, “according to the flesh” (1 Ne. 19:6; Alma 7:12–13).
Reason no. 2. Our Heavenly Father and His Beloved Son are, by nature, creators. As the sons and daughters of God, we have the potential to become like Them. The Father and the Son have entrusted us with a portion of Their creative power and provided specific guidelines for the proper use of that sacred ability to create life and establish an eternal family. How we feel about and use that sacred power in this life will determine in large measure whether additional creative power will be ours in the life to come.
Reason no. 3. As we attempt to answer the question about why we are here on the earth, we usually consider receiving a physical body and being tested as two related but separate parts of the answer. However, an essential part of the test of mortality is having and properly using a physical body. Please consider carefully the following statement by President Brigham Young (1801–77):
“The spirit is pure, and under the special control and influence of the Lord, but the body is of the earth, and is subject to the power of the Devil, and is under the mighty influence of that fallen nature that is of the earth. If the spirit yields to the body, the Devil then has power to overcome the body and spirit of that man, and he loses both.
“Recollect, brethren and sisters, every one of you, that when evil is suggested to you, when it arises in your hearts, it is through the temporal organization. When you are tempted, buffeted, and step out of the way inadvertently; when you are overtaken in a fault, or commit an overt act unthinkingly; when you are full of evil passion, and wish to yield to it, then stop and let the spirit, which God has put into your tabernacles, take the lead. If you do that, I will promise that you will overcome all evil, and obtain eternal lives. But many, very many, let the spirit yield to the body, and are overcome and destroyed” (Discourses of Brigham Young, sel. John A. Widtsoe [1941], 70).
In 2 Nephi 2:26–29 [2 Ne. 2:26–29] we read:
“And the Messiah cometh in the fulness of time, that he may redeem the children of men from the fall. And because that they are redeemed from the fall they have become free forever, knowing good from evil; to act for themselves and not to be acted upon, save it be by the punishment of the law at the great and last day, according to the commandments which God hath given.
“Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man. And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself.
“And now, my sons, I would that ye should look to the great Mediator, and hearken unto his great commandments; and be faithful unto his words, and choose eternal life, according to the will of his Holy Spirit;
“And not choose eternal death, according to the will of the flesh and the evil which is therein, which giveth the spirit of the devil power to captivate, to bring you down to hell, that he may reign over you in his own kingdom.”
Neither passage asserts that the physical body is inherently evil. Rather, they teach that we live in a fallen world. The very elements out of which our bodies were created are by nature fallen and ever subject to the pull of sin, corruption, and death. Thus, the Fall of Adam and its consequences affect us most directly through our physical bodies. And yet as President Young stated, we are dual creatures, for at the same time that we inhabit a physical body that is subject to the Fall, we also have a spirit that represents the eternal part of us. We are the spirit sons and daughters of God and have inherited divine qualities from Him. The precise nature of the test of mortality, then, can be summarized in the following questions: Will my body rule over my spirit, or will my spirit rule over my body? Will I yield to the enticings of the natural man or to the eternal man? That, brothers and sisters, is the test. We are here on the earth to develop godlike qualities and to learn to bridle all of the passions of the flesh (see Alma 38:12).

I found the scripture he quotes about bridling all of the passions of the flesh interesting, and I applied it mightily to my habits of overeating. I also found the whole scripture in Alma 38:12 very interesting.
12 Use boldness, but not overbearance; and also see that ye bridle all your passions, that ye may be filled with love; see that ye refrain from idleness.

Some people might not know what or how a bridle works. They might simple know that it is used on a horse. A bridle is put in the most sensitive part of the horse's mouth so when it is pulled just a little this way or that the horse immediately feels it. There is not a horse alive who doesn't feel the bridle and bit when it is on his face and in his mouth. It is supposed to be a little uncomfortable so the horse will stay focused.

We too will be able to stay focused as we bridle our passions and we will stay focused on the rod of iron instead of being lead this way or that. And yes bridling your passions will be uncomfortable. Life is not meant to be a cake walk, but we are meant to find "joy in the journey" not fun in the trip.

The next part of the scripture "that ye may be filled with love" also hit me. Think about how fun it is to ride a horse, a really good horse. A horse who doesn't fight you all the way, think how much easier you appreciate and love an animal like that. You want to use that horse more when you know you can trust it because when you ride him it often it feels like you are one.

I think this might be the same with God, in bridling our passion's in completely lending our wills to God's will and letting him take hold of the reins, how much more will He be able to love and appreciate us. How much more will He be able to use us. And the more He uses us the more we will have His love.

This was an "aha" moment for me. I find the more I bridle my passion for over eating and take away that crutch, I have turned more to my Heavenly Father and begged for more love, more patience, more temperance, more peace, more strength to overcome, and finally more Savior like thee. I have been filled with not only love but also strength beyond my human capacity.
Could it possibly be that in bridle this passion of mine I have opened another avenue of love for my savior and father to help and love me? Yes I know that it is true.

Corthinans 6:19-20 states
19 What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?
  20 For ye are abought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.

This was a wonderful thought to me I can love God’s temple I can take care of God’s temple that he has loaned me. I have been bought with a high price, the price of blood of every pore in the Garden of Gethsemane, the sacrifice of God’s son, my brother, the only perfect being on earth. Will I pay down the debt? Surely as I attempt he will provide ways to do so.

One of my favorite scriptures since I have become a parent is found in Matthew 7: 7-11

7 ¶ aAsk, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:
  8 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.
  9 Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone?
  10 Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?
  11 If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?

I know how much I love my children; I know how much I want them to succeed. And if I being evil know how to give good gifts then really how much more shall my all knowing all seeing Father in Heaven give good things to them that ask.

So here I am on earth, finally understanding and loving my temple, then why do I keep failing once in a while?

This was another moment for me, while pondering this question I went back to the war the very first war that we know about the war in heaven, and I thought about the loser. Yes Satan, his punishment, he has no body.

Sister Susan W. Tanner in the November 2005, Ensign, says this about him.
Satan learned these same eternal truths about the body, and yet his punishment is that he does not have one. Therefore he tries to do everything he can to get us to abuse or misuse this precious gift. He has filled the world with lies and deceptions about the body. He tempts many to defile this great gift of the body through unchastity, immodesty, self-indulgence, and addictions. He seduces some to despise their bodies; others he tempts to worship their bodies. In either case, he entices the world to regard the body merely as an object. In the face of so many satanic falsehoods about the body, I want to raise my voice today in support of the sanctity of the body. I testify that the body is a gift to be treated with gratitude and respect.

Satan doesn't want me to take care of this body, he wants me to defile it in any way, he wants me to despise it, he wants me to think poorly of myself, he wants to physically disable me so I cannot continue to do the Lord’s will.
Some of that is because
“Our physical bodies look like our spirit bodies. After we die and are resurrected, our bodies will be made perfect. They will be healthy and strong. Anything that was wrong with our bodies while we were alive on earth will be corrected. We will each look like our own best self.” (Diane Mangum, Jehovah and the Wonderful Plan of Our Heavenly Father, January 2010.)

I believe that after we die we are essentially the same people only that our feelings are intensified, so if we are not pleased or think badly about about ourselves now how hard will it be to correct those feelings when we die?

7 For as he athinketh in his heart, so is he:… Proverbs 23:7

As we continue to love and take care of our temples inside and out we will be able to more correctly align ourselves with God’s purpose for us on earth. This is my truest wish and pray.