The rest of the story

I have never enjoyed a race more than that of last Saturday. Didn't get up until 6:30, ate a good breakfast, oatmeal, and Gatorade. Brother picked up my daughter and I, left the rest of the kids home because my dear sweet sister was at my house, so I didn't have worry about my kids.

Got there said hello to hubby, siblings, and friends. Then lined up for the race, and I didn't know there was a special lady there to shoot the starting pistal. Her name is Lori Morrison, I remember Lori from my youth as one of those women who ran long distances, she was one of the first people to plant the question in my head, "Could I do that?"

And just like that we were off, for me the first part of the race is always daunting, so I often have to think one foot in front of the other one foot in front of the other. I had previously decided to not turn on the music until mile 3, I don't why, maybe to give me something to look forward too?

We come to the first water station, and my friends Jim and Anita are there. Jim and Anita are also on the way to choosing a healthier lifestyle. Last year Anita and I were at Stake Young Women's camp together and she climbed Table Mountain the best she could, it was one of the most inspiring things I have ever seen. They are also good friends with my in-laws and are the kind of friends that help you out in a pinch. I pass by, they give me Gatorade and good cheer. My brother David darts ahead, this is his game plan the whole time, he will run at his pace which is a lot faster than mine and then walk for a while until I catch up to him in which we compare what is hurting and who is at the water stations, and what music we are listening too. I love him beyond measure. He has always made it very easy for me to picture my other "Brother", and how he would give his life for me.

At mile two, is a heart break. It is Jesse's cousin manning the water station, her mother passed away from cancer over three years ago and she is the reason that the race was started to raise funds for cancer. I think about Aunt Karen, how she actually in some way is still fighting her battle with cancer, because of this race, only in she is doing it in our Heavenly Home. Jocelyn her lovely, smilie, and humours daughter gives me Gatorade and encouragement.

Mile three, music on, and another good friend, Kim Weston. She actually leaves her water station and runs to me, grabs my hand as we both cry and run toward the water station. She was training for this run, but got hurt which put her out. She was also best friends with my Aunt Karen, and helped her through the end of her days. Her daughter hands me Gatorade and smiles cheerfully. I take careful sips, toss it in the white garbage bucket, and look ahead. Only to see my darling sister-in-law snapping photos at the top of the next hill. She has my job this year I am usually the one taking photos, I try to keep my eyes open, only to remember that I am wearing sun glasses. But the smile is easy for the picture. I can't believe I am really doing this. I am here running this 1/2 marathon, instead of being on sidelines behind a camera. Oh thank you, Heavenly Father for my body, thank you for your help, love, and commitment to me. I could not have done it without you. We get the first pass by of my brother in law who has his truck full of kids who are all yelling out the window "Go, Go, Go!"

Mile four is a reminder of how quickly life can change. Also, that what every happens to you, you always have the choice of how to respond to it. At this water station are two relatives, one who has just finished another round of Chemotherapy, and Aunt June. The first has worked all his life to provide for his family. I imagine he also wanted to retire and be the Grandpa he always wanted to be, his goals now might include seeing his children married? He is jovial, I have never seen him without a smile on his face. Aunt June is one of the most positive people I know, and also has been through more heartache than I can imagine some of which includes loss of a husband, and family. I believe that she chooses every day to get out of bed, and put a smile on her face, she chooses to serve others in any way she can. It reminds me of an experience I had while my daughter Sara was in the Children's Hospital in the Oncology unit. There was another mom there with her son who was receiving Chemo, I attempted to make conversation with her and she shot me down big time. Her mother over heard the whole thing and said to me after "Please forgive her, she isn't dealing very well right now." Of course, who could blame her, she has more right than anyone else for being bitter. But then I meet another mom, who choose to take the other way and stay positive through the whole thing and actually find ways to help serve others while she and her daughter were there. And for the first time, I realize happiness, joy, peace, they are choices, not just feelings or things that happen to you. I am reminded that I choose these things too and some of those choices have brought me here running on a black top pavement toward a goal that I have worked very hard to succeed at. My brother in law has parked the truck with the kids sitting on the tailgate all cheering for everybody but they get louder for their Uncle David and I. I wish I had a camera but can't imagine the extra weight.

Mile five I am met by an old boss who, has given so much for our little community. He has worked most of his life to help our community with recreation activities to help keep us as fit as we would allow ourselves to become. I imagine when I was working with him I probably weighed anywhere from 230 to 250lbs. I look at him as he hands me Gatorade and say would you ever imagined I could or would do this?? He smiles his darling smile and giggles and little, and before he answers I am off again. Here I run into my Gen who is taking pictures of me, I yell at her "What are you doing your suppose to be at a conferance?" She yells back "I am going, but first I have to take these beautiful pictures of you. You are doing so great!" I love her, she is married to my friend Nathan that I mentioned later. I love it when your friends marry people that make you like them more. (Sorry Nate but it is true.)

Mile six at this point I have run across the highway a few times to give high fives to friends of my who are already on their way home, I am yelling and cheering for those on there way home. This is the great thing about this sport, yeah is competitive but the competition is between you the road, and your beliefs it rarely involves other human beings. I see my childhood friend Nathan who started training for this race three years ago because his brother in law was going through cancer. I am pretty sure he has run every year. You should check out his blog by clicking on his name. I think about his journey, and I am once again amazed at the abilities of the human spirit and body combined can do. I see my sister in law the one that took me to Boston with her, and love her so much and only want the best things in life for her, I am so grateful that for the moment she is living close. I also pass my brother in law Terry but I don't recognize him in time for a high five, I am delighted he is running today it is his first time. I imagine he must need the release because he has been at the children's hospital a lot lately with his son Rafe I hope that this race can be somewhat healing for him. David and I are running together when we see our sister Pam she is cruising, we dart across the highway again for another high five.

At this water station is a long time friend, well actually I went to school with his son, but I would still consider him a friend. He is an honest to goodness cowboy. The kind that might not wear wranglers all the time but has put his heart and soul into working the land and raising cattle. These really are a vanishing breed, he is always one of my favourite people to see anywhere, and always has a smile waiting for me just like he does now as he hands me some Gatorade. I feel like he is proud of me and what I am doing but also a little worried just like my Dad might be. I think he offers me a way out of running the rest of race but I can't really remember. It has started to rain, but I don't seem to notice, or if I do my mental training of "Hello rain come and run with me today" has kicked in so it hasn't really registered. I am at the turn around and start heading for home "Wow this has been fun so far I am not feeling anything I feel great" I think to myself. I dart across the road to tell the lady behind me how proud I am of her and how great she is doing she smiles and says thank you I am sure she thinks I am a crackpot. But oh well it made me feel good.

Mile seven comes and it is the Ranchers wife, I say to her "Are you surprised to see me?" she laughs and says of course not. I take the Gatorade and keep going. Mile eight seems to take forever the wind has picked up and it seems to be pushing me around a little, I start to feel tired for the first time. David has picked up speed he is way ahead right now. I start to self talk "Mile eight that is bull crap you just ran ten miles last week you are not tired at mile eight if you want to be tired you can be tired at mile 11. Ok I say, I am guess I am not tired."

David is waiting for me at the water station at mile eight but he is stretching out his calves, I yell at him without really slowing down, "Is that serious or are you just waiting for me?" he doesn't really say anything I am concerned for him. At this water station is my old boss again because his dear sweet wife has decided to walk with the person who is in last place that makes me want to cry. But she is exactly like that, she is one of the angels of quiet service. I believe these people will have the biggest mansions in heaven. I feel renewed by my self talk that I am not tired. I start to notice the traffic going by. I try and think of what they are thinking. Are they annoyed that they have to slow down a little? Are they in awe that I would ever think to accomplish such a task? Are they wondering what would ever posses a person to run this far in the rain? Are they inspired? Do they get the question planted in their head "Could I ever do that?" Uncle Barry drives by honks unrolls his window, asks "Do you want a ride?" I smile and shake my head no. "Do you want a chocolate bar?" I laugh and say "Not yet!"

Mile nine is windy, cold, and more rain. I get to the water station with Cousin Dick and Aunt June. Cousin Dick has brought donuts, he is so cute, the thought of eating one makes me sick. Aunt June is in the truck so I go and knock on the window. She then gets out of the truck (I didn't mean for that to happen) she gives me a big hug and tells me I am doing great.

The thing that really gets me to mile ten is that I know at the top of that hill I can see the Temple. The favourite primary song wanders over my thoughts as I run.

I love to see the Temple

I am going there some day

to feel the holy spririt

to listen and to pray

for the Temple is a house of God

a place of love and beauty

I'll prepared myself while I am young

this is my scared duty.

I feel extremely blessed to have grown up and live so close to a Temple. I am again so grateful for all those people in my life who have helped me prepare myself while I was young. I am reminded how my body is a Temple and a house for my spirit, and how it has been prepared for this moment. The tiredness is gone. I see Kim again at this water station she again runs out to meet me, tells me she is proud of me. I grab some Gatorade, and keep going. I do see the Temple and the corner for the last couple of miles home. I don't know how to explain my next friend that cycles by to you, he loves biking as much as I love running, he and I struggle with food addiction, he is an athlete with other commitments, and is working very hard at trying to balance things out. I always feel connected to him.

Mile eleven, my sister, sister in law, and brother in law drive by with all our kids. There are hands, hollers, and hoorays failing out each window. I love them, they love me, I feel like a superhero/Olympian. They make a couple more rounds. I come again to my cousin Jocelyn, at this water station she hands me water and smiles. I am distracted because the cheering convoy is parked around the corner, and I am wondering why? As I turn the corner for the last 2.1 miles my sister Pam jumps out of the car, and starts running with us. Yes she is already done the race and has come back to run the rest with David and I. I tell her she is crazy, I would love to cry, and tell her thank you, but it is not in me right now. For the first time David mentions that we are on track to finish under three hours, my heart skips a beat, which is kind of dangerous to do at this point. I lift my head, I really don't know how to feel. I am exhilarated at the thought of finishing under three hours but also reminding myself that what ever happens I will love myself. Another friend cycles up, I keep trying to get to know her better, but other things get in the way. She too is an athlete with other commitments right now. She tells me to stand up straighter, and I do. I tell her I am doing great and don't hurt anywhere, she says "Well then get moving it isn't a race unless it hurts." I tell her to go tell my husband I want a kiss at the end. She says ok and zooms off.

Water station 12 is alone, it seems fitting, I take water telling myself that I can drink the whole cup if I want. I tell David and Pam that I am going to walk to the next approach and then run. David looks at his watch and says "@#$!, no we are going to make this thing under three hours." I look at him, throw down my cool drink of water and start running again. It is us, the three amigo's trotting down the highway.

We turn the corner for home, I choke back a gasp of tears, I increase the length of my stride I will myself to get there, I will myself to go faster. All of sudden there is my sister-in law, with my nephew Rafe who runs out to me for a high five, he gives me strength, go faster. There is my mother in law, "Good Job!", she gives me strength, go faster. I feel it, I feel the running blood rushing through my veins, it feels like I sprint to the finish line. There wild amounts of applause. I get my plush towel. I stop smiling only to realize that my face is frozen in a smile. I am finished. I get hugs, hand shakes, and hails. My old boss hugs me, "Did I ever think it was possible of course I thought it was possible." After I demand a hug and a kiss from Jesse I head inside. Barry is there with a spread of runners delight. I head for the hot chocolate, I tell Barry, thank you and give him a hug. I want to tell him I am waiting for him. I am waiting for Barry to be ready to start his journey. I will continue to wait, because if there is anything I have learned it is that no matter what I do, I do not want to take away anyone's agency to do miraculous things for them selves. And that is the rest of the story ,well almost.

My sisters, brother, and their spouses are all in the gym with our rowdy kids running a muck. I am on a different plane.

I am peaceful.

xoxo

Barb

P.S. If I have quoted you wrong or missed you in this post I am sorry but that is how I remembered it and heavens knows my memory isn't the best. Please forgive me.

13.1 (2nd)

I am finding this post hard to get started on. So let's just start.

THE RACE

It was everything I hoped it would be, fun, challenging, fun, wet, fun, windy, and really fun. Some people wouldn't think that you could have fun running 13.1 miles. But those people don't have my life.

2.53 hours

alone, just you, the road, Heavenly Father, some wind, some rain, some music, a brother that comes and goes, a sister that goes too fast, some friends who help you along. Really there is nothing else I would rather be doing. Not only that but improving on your time by

22 minutes.

Now for the pictures.....

Jesse and I pre-race, it was the first time I had seen him that morning since he was gone by 5am to help set up for the race.

My sister Pam, my brother David, and me pre-race.

My brother-in-law Terry, my sister-in-law Kate, and me pre-race.

Don't see me at the starting line, that's right because I always line up at the back. The guy standing in front is my darling Father-in-law, and I could blog about him all day long because he is the one of the greatest, honest, and kindest men I know.

Yep, there you see me in the far right grey back, and orange sleeves. Yes the very last one. But I will have you know that I did not come in last.

My brother Dave and I, yeah we pretty much had that much fun the whole way.


Totally sprinted to the end, I am sure it looked like slow motion to everybody else but it felt really fast.


AHH, the plush towel, will ya look at that smile you can't pay money to get that smile.


Getting a hug and a smooch from my adorable hubby/race official. I promise to write more about it soon.

xoxox

Barb

It's Snowing

Really, I woke up to snow today, May 27, 2011.
In 24 hours the gun will go off.
Now might be a good time to remember why I am doing this. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm?

Training for and running a marathon (and 1/2 marathon) is not a single event; rather, it is an experience. It is a discovery of self that will forever change your perceptions, perspectives, priorities, and possibilities. You will meet yourself at what you thought were the boundaries of your potential and endurance and watch in awe as they evaporate to reveal only open expanse. To know that the only boundries in life are those which we create ourselves is a discovery which can not be taught - IT MUST BE EXPERIENCED. For once you have seen the view from the mountain top, living a life of voluntary blindess is no longer an option.

(The Non-runner's Marathon Trainer pg132-133)


Oh yeah that is why.
I am going to write it here and think it all day tomorrow. I am prepared for this event, and I will complete it. I will break through any boundaries put in my way to accomplish this goal.

I CAN, I WILL, I AM.

I CAN, I WILL, I AM.

xoxo

Barb
Please pray for no snow and no wind!

Getting nervous and as promised the Resolution Run

Just in time for the first check. On December 31. 2010, I ran a 5k called The Resolution Run. While running this run I chanted 155, Legacy 1/2, Pocatello full. On the eve of fulfilling one of those goals I have finally finished this video. Hope you all enjoy.

xoxox

Barb

PS. Totally went to the Doctor this today to get antibiotics for a nasty sinus/ear thing. Really hope I can get rid of this before the race. I have to tell you I am a little nervous.

Running my own race

It was my birthday along with mother's day on Sunday. I love my family very much but knowing that they would not be able to fulfill my needs, or wants, I took off with some lovely women to Calgary for Time Out for Women. It was just what I needed. My favourite speaker of the weekend was Laurel Christensen (click on her name to take you to her blog). She is so great. She talked about deciding what you want, and then asking the Lord if it is the right thing to want, and then praying about it with your whole soul. Ok but she did it way better and cuter than anything I have ever seen. I also identified with her because she is running her first 1/2 marathon on June 11. She is darling and you have to check her out!

Speaking of running 1/2 marathons, AHHHHHH only 14 days until the Legacy 1/2 marathon. The nine miles I ran last this morning and it was windy and cold and hard I cried as Jesse drove me to the drop off point and I cried on the couch when I was finished. Last week was 8 miles and they were so great, that I was really excited about this race. Since Jesse and I have kind of helped with it since the beginning, I kind of feel like I am running my own race. I have wanted to run this race every since my wonderful Father in Law started it three years ago, and so now it is a dream come true. And the first of my New Year's resolutions to accomplish this year. Running a 1/2 marathon in May in Canada means you have got some heart because the training weather has not been nice.

Got to get the mileage in next year I am getting a treadmill!

Anyway the more I think about crossing the finish line with a lot of people I love and admire being there the more excited I am about the race. I picture myself really enjoying it, stoping at each water station to say hello to neighbours and friends and running on my own road, toward my mountains, and my home town. I feel excited, confident, and peaceful. I haven't quite put the whole metaphor together yet but there is something to be said about running your own race.

Feeling like this post is a little weak but it is all I have time for.

xoxo

Barb

Kind of Great

Thanks to the Grace of God I am.

Breathing

Laughing

Smiling

Crying

Walking

Running

Cooking

Eating

Loving

Listening

Talking

Sharing

Teaching

Learning

Hopping

Living

Reading

Typing

I am feeling grateful this week. My life isn't perfect but it is very good. My eating isn't perfect but it is very good. My goal for the next week is too have one perfect food day. Meaning just eating good things all day! Today started off so great with a 4 mile run, a smoothie, and soup, followed by a brancrisp with 1/2 tsp of Nutella. Strawberries, some cheese, two crackers, gum, a sugar free candy, more soup, a bun and it is only one o'clock. But there is always tomorrow.

I feel as tho I am pursuing my weight loss goal on a tread mill right now, totally doing it put one foot in front of the other and making it happen, but really not going anywhere. But I do have complete faith that it will eventually come. I am also focused on the Legacy 1/2 Marathon that is at the end of this month. I am feeling good about it but not super confident. It is only my 2nd 1/2 Marathon I am kinda of interested to see how it will pan out.

I signed the kids and I up of the Cardston Kids Marathon. They seem excited about it. Last night we marked off 1/2 a mile for them so they run out to the marker and back so then they know they have done their mile for the day!

I am excited about Canada's new majority Conservative government. I have to say I was very disheartened over this last election, I really thought nothing was going to change. Therefore I didn't do as much election stuff as I have in the past. But as Jesse and I watched the results come in last night I was elated. I have great hopes at what the government can do now. I am also quite relieved at the number of seats that the BQ have, I strongly feel that this is great for my Wonderful nation.

I had a great Easter Break in Utah, visiting sisters's and parents. I will post pictures and talk about that later. Anyway doing kind of great.

xoxo

Barb

This is stolen from another blog but I love it, and it is just what we all need on the Easter week off! Good luck, this week, I am nervous, and anxious about getting through it unscathed. My favourite thing said in this letter is "FALLING ISN'T FAILING." We only fail when we give up and don't try anymore, something is better than nothing, head up , shoulders straight, one foot in front of the other.

Dear friend,

I just wanted you to know that I see how much you’ve been struggling lately. I know things have been difficult, but I wanted to remind you of a few things…

One, you’re awesome.

Two, this path you’re on, it’s rough-and-tumble stuff. One day you feel like you’re on top of the mountain, the next you’re rolling back down in a out-of-control somersault. And we both know that the climb back isn’t so much treacherous as it is tiresome. Some days we just get so darn weary with it all…

That said, look at how far you’ve come. You may think it’s nothing to celebrate, what you’ve achieved thus far, but I say every step… every freakin’ step… is worthy of being celebrated.

Three, falling isn’t failing. You’ll have bad days here and there; we all have setbacks that shake our confidence and exhaust our resolve, but I’m convinced that you’reconvinced that you know what to do now, and more importantly, what’s at stake. Going back to the way things were simply isn’t an option.

Four, it’s all worth it in the end. I know you question whether that’s true or not, but I promise you that it is. It may seem so far away right now, but every step forward brings you closer to where you want to be.

This is a long journey we’re on; don’t be afraid to lean on your friends from time to time.

And lastly, have I told you lately that you’re awesome?

Take care of yourself.

xoxo

Barb

The wisdom of friends

I had a good friend, go home to her maker, and her sweetheart this last week. I have been thinking about her and all the things she taught me. I remember that she has a painting in her "fancy room," of the Ten Virgins. This parable has always meant a lot to me. It can be interpreted in many different ways. I was thinking of it in two different ways, one way was about being prepared, and the other way was about those five virgins who could not share their oil.

When Heavenly Father created women He created them to be a help meet which means, a helper suited to, worthy of, or corresponding to him. He did a very good job. I don't know of a women out there who don't have a desire to help some one. Satan takes this wonderful value and twists it to his own use. He gets some women so caught up in helping or feeling like they are just never doing enough that they start to really feel bad about them selves. I am such a woman as this. I love helping other people. I love helping people in my community, my ward, my country. I love helping my family, but I feel like I can never do enough. Another good friend, said to me " we cannot fill everybody's lamps." Talk about a stop me in my tracks moment. I found huge relief in that statement. I can tell people how I am losing weight or how I find peace and salvation in the scriptures, and by attending the temple, but I cannot physically fill their lamps for them they have to do that themselves. Everybody has their own journey to fulfill. Knowing how unique, hard, joyful, hard, stupendous, and hard my journey has been I wouldn't want it given to me or I wouldn't want it given to anybody. It wouldn't mean as much.

Where ever you are, whatever your doing now on your journey, rejoice, because it is YOUR journey. No one else can do it for you, and when you have success you will understand that you wouldn't want anyone else to do it for you.

The other is being prepared, my lovely friend, was prepared to home.

"....but if ye are prepared ye shall not fear"

-D&C 38:30

Realizing that I just posted a blog on this whole subject I will be brief.

The only way to fill our lamps and vessels and keep them filled so we can be prepared is to do it consistently, drop by drop. The wisdom of consistency is all around us. How does a lake get filled? Drop by drop. How does the snow melt drop by drop. How do we become what we want to be? By consistently being who we want to become. (Richard G. Scott) Thanks Theodora, I love you always.

Good week until this weekend, but today is Monday and I am going to do better.

xoxox

Barb

Standing after Arrows

"The arrow seen before cometh less rudely"

-Divine Comedy - by Dante Alighieri

I have heard this quote a couple of times, this past year, but for some reason it hit me today. (No pun intended)

The fact of the matter is I get cocky. I have dodged arrows and tried to prepared myself against most arrows that are going to be thrown my way. But then arrow, which I have seen before, in fact EVERY MONTH, (sorry men) comes. I really think that, if I see the arrow coming than I can avoid the arrow. But that is really not what this quote says. It doesn't say if you seen it coming you can avoid it, it says if you see it coming it might not be so hard. You are still going to get hit with the arrow. It will still pierce you. It will still hurt. You will still have to treat the wound. But maybe just maybe, I can have the alcohol swabs and dressing ready to roll, so the wound won't feaster and take over my life for two weeks. Ok so now that I understand it maybe next month won't be so hard.

Meanwhile, I have stopped doing P90X, because I have started training for the Legacy 1/2 Marathon on May 28, 2011. I am using this training schedule, which is only three days a week, so that means the other three, I am still doing ABs, and Kettlebells. Jesse passed his HKC a couple of weeks ago in Seattle, and so we have been setting up workshops, and he has his first client already. I have to say I miss the intensity of the P90X.

I have been struggle lately with Food, just eating too many treats, so I cleared out the house again. It is funny how they just keep sneaking in seriously it is worse than having mice. But it is always very powerful feeling to throw them in the garbage.

I have been thinking a lot this week of my Mom and Dad again, I miss them. So glad they are serving our Heavenly Father but still missing them. I was remembering one time when I was riding my horse Dandy, and all of sudden he started bucking on me. I was terrified, and held on for life. Once he was done I started climbing off, and I have never seen my father move so quickly in his life, he came running across the pasture yelling at me to "GET BACK ON!" I was crying very hard, and when he reached me he dusted off my jeans and put me back in the saddle and had me ride around a little longer, then get off. I have to say that has been one of the most important experiences in my life. Every time I have physically,or emotionally fallen down I can always picture my Dad running toward me yelling

"Get up and Get back on"

I think there is a poem I read about it once. But I did find this song which is worth the read, I am dedicating it to my dear friend who always posts great songs on her blog. You know who you are!

Stand By Rascal Flatts

Written by Dan Ortan and Blair Daly

You feel like a candle in a hurricane
Just like a picture with a broken frame
Alone and helpless
Like you've lost your fight
But you'll be alright, you'll be alright

[Chorus:]
Cause when push comes to shove
You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break
Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up
Decide you've had enough
You get mad you get strong
Wipe your hands shake it off
Then you Stand, Then you stand

Life's like a novel
With the end ripped out
The edge of a canyon
With only one way down
Take what you're given before its gone
Start holding on, keep holding on

[Repeat Chorus]

Everytime you get up
And get back in the race
One more small piece of you
Starts to fall into place
Oh

[Repeat Chorus]

Ok, you been pierced, so get up, and Stand!

xoxoxox

Barb

Preparation

No, not as in Preparation-H you notty potties out there.

I have been thinking a lot this week on preparation, and hence forth this scripture.

"I tell you these things because of your prayers; wherefore, treasure up wisdom in your bosoms, lest the wickedness of men reveal these things unto you by their wickedness, in a manner whichshall speak in your ears with a voice louder than that which shallshake the earth; but if ye are prepared ye shall not fear."

D&C 38:30

I mostly know this scripture only by the promise at the end. "but if ye are prepared ye shall not fear." But reading it anew this week has put a different spin on things.

"I tell you these things because of your prayers, "

How often do I get my prayers answered by scripture? As often as I will allow it to be. Heavenly Father cannot answer my prayers with scriptures unless I choose to be in the scriptures. So check one if I want to be prepared better be reading my scriptures.

"..treasure up wisdom in your bosoms"

When you think about something that you really love and want to protect where do you hold it? When you think about how you hold an infant? I love the wisdom I receive from my Heavenly Father and I do hold it close.

"...lest the wickedness of men reveal these things unto you by their wickedness"

If we don't treasure, ponder, pray, and continually grow upon the wisdom, and blessing that Heavenly Father has given us, we have more venerability to listen to the wickedness of man.

"....in a manner which shall speak in your ears with a voice louder than that which shall shake the earth"

Ok so this one is a little bit of stretch, but when I read this it reminded me of what kind of music do we listen to? We now live in a world where people are literally plug into some kind of voice in their ears. I also thought of people who have sound systems in there car that are so loud that they shake the earth. Why do they have to listen to it that way? Is it so they won't or can't hear the spirit?

So what does this all have to do with weight loss?

Well I have to admit that I got kicked this week, the eating was not what it should be. Treats, left, right and centre. It has to do with missing my parents again I think? But I have to wonder why I am sabotaging myself by allow the treats in the house? I have decided not to beat myself up over it. Little steps, little steps, I am changing my lifestyle, not my weight. My drop in weight is only one of many positive repercussions.

But not all the days were bad, the days that I did succeed were days where I had planned out what I was going to eat the night before. Therefore the "preparation". I do better when I am prepared. When I have food in my house that is the right kind of food, so that when I am hungry there is good food to eat. When I am prepared I do not fear. When I have a plan I eat better.

I have also tried to prepare myself for General Conference this weekend. I have done this by attending the temple twice this week, and by earnest prayer, and scriptures study. I love the temple.

I am feeling like this post is weak, but its all I have got. So once again life, just like in running, keep your head up, focus on the end goal, and keep lifting, placing, and moving one foot in front of the other.

xoxxoxo

ps This was suppose to be posted last week. So I should have another one for this week, maybe!!???