Why Barefoot??

WHY BAREFOOT????
Because being barefoot to me is being raw. Feeling every sharp rock, lush clover, spiky thistle, cushioned blade of grass, slimy covered stones, fragrant feathered flowers, cereal of sand, bead of water, element of litter, and the mash of mud.

Being Barefoot is the promise of prancing in the moonlight, leaping in the waves, running through a meadow, dancing on the porch, and doing all this while enduring a long journey to the end.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

1st attempt

Ok this is was my first attempt at my talk that I am suppose to give at the Lifestyles Success night on Monday.
After writing this talk I learned that I need to keep it to 3 minuets. This talk was clearly going to be too long, but I felt it was good enough to share it all with you. Hope you enjoy.

Hi, my name is Barb, and I am a food addict. Crowd says "Hi BARB” Good to know you’re all with me.

The lifestyles program has given me the tools I need to fulfill my life the way I am supposed to, and the way I want too. I am going to give you some snapshots of my 90 pound weight loss, journey.

May 2009
I went to see a foot Doctor because my feet hurt so bad, that I was actually starting to walk funny. He says you need to lose weight; I say I am trying to run but my feet hurt. He says you need to lose weight. I leave the office very hurt.
I talk to a friend, and neighbor, I say you look great, what have you been doing? She says Lifestyles at the clinic. I talk to another friend and neighbor she says Lifestyles at the clinic. I decide to pick up an application; I can’t run off this weight, so I guess it is time to work on the food.

August 2009
I get a phone call from the clinic saying there is an opening in the Lifestyles program. There is no excitement about this, maybe embarrassment, or nervousness but definitely no excitement.
I drag my 3 yr old and 1 yr old into Linda’s office at the clinic. They destroy her office literally. She says it’s ok we are working on moving down stairs. I ask her if this program is really possible to do while having small children at home she tells me about Patricia Beazer, everyone assumes I know Patricia but we have never met.
I decide to have faith in Linda, and the program. I don’t think that Linda would lie to me. But there is a thought in the back of my head that says “ok lady I’ll do everything you want me to do and we will just see if it works.”
I found a quote that describes this month
"This one step - choosing a goal and staying to it - changes everything." - Scott Reed

October 2009
My first real trial I have to take my daughter up to the Children’s Hospital for tests. How am I going to do this while being on the program??? I think I am going to quit, I can’t deal with trying to change my eating habits and myself while I am trying to help my little girl.
I decide to take it easy on myself.
This months quote
“Achievement seems to be connected with action. Successful men and women keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit." - Conrad Hilton

December 2009
I have lost 25 pounds. I just might be able to do this. Linda says that I should try eating just a salad for lunch. I smile and nod thinking in my head. “This lady is coo coo.” I still make sugar cookies and fudge for Christmas but I don’t eat all, yeah me, maybe I can do this.
I take some time to think about the real meaning of Christmas instead of eating everything I want.
This months quote
"If, as Herod, we fill our lives with things, and again with things; if we consider ourselves so unimportant that we must fill every moment of our lives with action, when will we have the time to make the long, slow journey across the desert as did the Magi? Or sit and watch the stars as did the shepherds? Or brood over the coming of the child as did Mary? For each one of us, there is a desert to travel. A star to discover. And a being within ourselves to bring to life."

March 2010
I decide to start getting serious about the program. I deserve to do this for myself. My family deserves a mom who would do this for herself.
I trade baby sitting with a friend, which is a really big deal because I hate baby sitting, and sign up for group therapy.
Weight loss is 35 pounds.
Quote of the month
"There's a very positive relationship between people's ability to accomplish any task and the time they're willing to spend on it." - Joyce Brothers

May 2010
I turn 35 years old and have lost 53 pounds. I speak at the Lifestyles Retreat. It is a life altering experience, I am doing what my Heavenly Father has sent me here to do. I am treating myself as a daughter of God. I am taking care of God’s greatest gift to me--my body. I write in my journal, “I really am going to be successful at this, and I can’t wait to see what will hit me next. Will it be a different size in clothes, passing a mirror and seeing my reflection, seeing an old friend, or meeting a new friend? Will it be running faster, longer, or discovering a new favorite vegetable dish?” I shop at a second hand store and things fit me, who knew buying trek clothing could be so fun. At the women’s pull at trek, I figure out, I won’t be able to do it on my own, I am going to need help. AND WHEN I NEED IT, HELP WILL BE THERE. I start quoting myself.

June 2010
I sign up for a 1/2 Marathon just 14 weeks away. Really! Oh well, “You can’t cross a sea by merely staring into the water.”
I write beside my 58 pounds lost“Giddy up”.
I write in my journal “I lost the 58 pounds, no one else did it, no one else can do it for me.”
I take the walk across the aisle at Walmart, I walk from the plus section to the other side, time seems to go into slow motion Really? Am I really here? There are a variety of colours I grab a couple of shirts like I am going to shop lift them and move to the dressing room to try them on. I walk into the dressing room like you would walk into a high business job interview so nervous you would like to puke but looking confident just the same. They fit, they fit, I want to tell the world in fact I think I did tell the cashier. “I am buying this XL t-shirt for me because it fits” Not only that but it costs $2 less.
I WANT THIS JOURNEY.
I pick up candy at the grocery store for Young Women’s that night, my four year old yells so everyone in the store can hear. “MOMMY WE DON’T BUY CANDY.” I am so proud I want to cry.
I start quoting my four year old.

July 2010
CLIMB A MOUNTAIN. I feel strong and of a good courage. I continue training for my 1/2 even at Girls camp running through the forest makes me feel, like my spirit is in control of my body.
I hit 70 pounds weight loss, and write beside it “WOW”.
I start a blog, because I miss, group, it helps me.
I am hiking up a storm with close friends, and my family.
This is who I wanted to be.
I run 8, then 9 miles.
I run on the new path in Waterton it is grand.
I run from my house to town along a road I have driven my whole life, I am superwoman.
I say goodbye to parents, as they leave on a mission I am reminded that I am also on a mission.
The quote of the month is
"If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours."

August 2010
People start noticing that I am losing weight I think “really because I have been doing this for a year.”
I continue training for my 1/2 marathon the miles are adding up people are very supportive in their comments and honking as I run along the highway.
I run a bit with one of the women I have always admired.
I run up Whitefish mountain while waving and smiling at a whole parade of classic Model T-Fords. One couple stops and asks “if I am ok”. I laugh and say “yeah physically but maybe not so much here!” (pointing to my head).
I miss my mom and dad, and I find a new friend.
I take my daughter for more tests at the Children’s Hospital, it is scary, and sad for me, but I am with her in a way I have never been before. We talk about living in the moment and leaving the rest to God. I decide to “feel the feeling and not eat it”, I feel ALIVE, even though it hurts.
I go horse back riding, something I haven’t done for ages, because I couldn’t get on.
I AM LIVING MY LIFE.
I run with my Goliath, and beat him in the end.
I hurt my foot while running 12 miles.
Dr. Clarke x-ray’s my foot and gives me the go ahead.
I know that it will probably hurt while running the 1/2 marathon but it isn’t going to wreck it permanently.
I take the next week and a half off trying to heal up for the race.
I have faith in the training, I am ready.
I am at 76 pounds weight loss.
I am a little disappointed because I wanted to be at 80 pounds for my one year mark, and then I laugh at myself for being disappointed for losing 76 pounds.
The quote is
"Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do." - John Wooden

September 2010
I run 13.1 miles.
I run 13.1 miles.
I blog this about the last 1.1 miles.
Mile 13 Ok this is starting to look familiar. I am going to finish this. Some lady jogs by trying to get us to run with her and she is nice. It makes me feel a little bad that I can't make her feel good by doing what she asks, but it is just not going to happen right now. I am starting to cry a little; this is REALLY hard.

The last 200 meters I tell my sisters and brother in-law to go ahead and I will finish alone, they all say no but will be right behind me and promise not to talk. I see my brother who had run the 5 k and his little girl waiting for me. I look him in the eye and we both start to cry. I keep going. I am running now, I see the end, all of sudden there is my other two sisters, my parents, my children, my sister-in- law, and on the other side my husband. I only glance, the emotion is too much I have just got to finish. I hear the announcer talking about me he says I am from my hometown and CANADA. I raise my arms in celebration of me and my country. Then my sister is beside me yelling at him that we are sisters and that it is my first 1/2. There is a medal placed around my neck there are three water bottles in my hands and so much happiness and love it is hard to explain.
I take another week and a half off running, because of my hurt foot. I start training with Kettle bells.
I hit 80 pounds of weight loss and move my name up on the “board.”
The Quote is
Winston Churchill - “Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved."

October 2010
I struggle with little to no weight loss on some weeks but I am not going to stop, I have 80 pounds worth of testimony, that this program works.
I hit under 200 hundred pounds, it has been over 10 years since I weighed that much. I celebrate with Jesse, and with my Group.
I take off for the weekend with some girlfriends, for shopping and a Five-K run. It is ridiculously fun.
I speak at a Relief Society meeting on “Change” it ends up being a wonderful, positive, night.

LAST SATURDAY - My two year old sees me tying up my running shoes, so she runs up stairs and brings me back my Pocatello 1/2 marathon medal. I put it on just to see her smile and she looks up at me and says “Go mommy go!”
How can I fail her?
How can I fail myself?
How can I fail God?
I can’t. And I won’t.
I am great. I am wonderful. I am inspiring. BUT, so are you. I am no greater than you I am no better than you, I am no more inspiring than you. I have hard stuff, so do you. I am successful with this program and so you can be too.

So I stand here before you today at 90 pounds weight loss, still a food addict, and one last quote: “my addiction is waiting for me in the parking lot.” But now I am not only a food addict but also a life addict.
Thank you.

9 comments:

  1. Oh Barb, you Nailed that one!!! Good job!! Too bad they only want 3 minutes!! They are missing out!! I say, you're first, "Go for it" What are they going to do, Drag you off away from the Mike??? I bet they get so involved they forget to look at the clock!!!
    Love the numbers on the side, something to be proud of young one!!!
    Oh, and I can see you now, Smashing as ever in Red!! The "Sisterhood Rocks!"
    I know, I know, shush up already Dixie!!! :)

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  2. I am sad that you have to pare this down to three minutes. I especially loved reading the quote that described and/or inspired each month. Please encourage those who listen to write down their journey. Beautiful, Barbs.

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  3. You are a rock!! You totally inspire me and my weight loss! Thanks for being my "HERO" and smiling at me when I am having little (HUGH) dumps in the road!!

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  4. I am also going to the lifestyles dinner. I can't wait to hear your talk in person. You help to inspire each and every one of us and to help us keep going and never give up.

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  5. I love it Barb and yes, 3 minutes is not long enough. You will do great and you will motivate those who hear you. Have fun........

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  6. barb! i just thought i'd let you know how inspiring you are! a few months ago my mom was telling me about how you've been running - and i thought it was awesome. then 2 months ago i saw a flyer at the library for the dallas 1/2 marathon, so i picked it up. thought i'd think it over.

    i did it! this past weekend -- i totally did it. and around mile 11, i wanted to die, but i thought of you and kept going.

    you're awesome!

    p.s. we have a family blog that's private, but if you send me your email address, i will send you an invite. you can email me at lanni.romney@gmail.com

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  7. Just wanted to let you know that you did an awesome job at the Lifestyles Recognition Dinner.

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  8. You have done an amazing job, Barb. Whenever I have hard times getting up for a workout, I just think of you, what you have done, and how it didn't happen over night or on its own. I once did the lifestyles program in Lethbridge before having Sam and it really helped then. It is a great program.

    Now, I am starting over with the program. I know it is not going to be an easy path, but I want to be a better example for my children. Between you and Janice, I know that there is other people out there who struggle and still succeed. Thanks Barb for staying at it, even when it is hard.

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  9. Love this message and your journaled journey. Thanks for the inspiration!!

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