10

Here are 10 highlights from my 10 mile run this morning
1. My cutest, sweetest, smartest, nicest, brother ran the first two miles with me.

2. I ran up Cahoon hill without stopping even once.

3. A friend named Greg passing me on a bike twice yelling "Your doing great Barb keep going."

4. My Aunt and neighbour seeing us start out at 5:30 am and then passing me again on her way home from town pulling over to tell me how amazing I am.

5. Same sweetheart person taking my jacket so I didn't have to carry it or tie it to my waist.

6. Running a route that I have driven my whole life.

7. Seeing the sun rise and how it hits the earth in different places and times.

8. Running up all of the hills didn't walk at all.

9. Seeing one of my favourite people and also my father in law who pulled over and said "Your here already" even though I had been running for 2 hours at that point. He also said "Your doing great" and I said "Thank you" instead of denying how great I am doing or making light out of it. I just really accepted it.

10. Making it to my In-laws house complete with welcoming committee while I was stretching on the grass.

The rest of the day went very well. Thanks to an incredible supportive husband. I got to go to the temple, get my visiting teaching done, and visited some people who I needed to visit.

I am feeling like it is time to talk a little about the basic's of why I am losing weight like the physical aspect. This is what I do everyday. Right now because of the weight I am at I get to eat:
5 carbs, 3 fruit, 3 milk, 3 protein, 3 fats, and as many vegetables as I choose to.
Each carb is 100 cal.
Each fruit is 60 cal.
Each milk is 90 cal.
Each protein 150 cal.
Each fat is 70 cal.

There is so much more information I kind of feel overwhelmed trying to tell you so I am just starting here.

Some people feel like oh if I knew I could only eat that I would feel trapped or denied.
I kind of look at it the same way I would look at smoking or drinking alcohol. By choosing to do those things you are choosing to give away your free agency because once you are drunk you have no self control or once you are addict to smoking you lose your choice to smoke or not to smoke. Some of you might feel this is a little extreme but for me it is not.

I still have the choice of what to eat but by me choosing to stay in these guide lines I have more freedom with my body LITERALLY.

Any way I write down everything that passes through my lips. Which because I am a little lazy makes me a food snob (I stole this phrase from one of my heros that I will talk to you about later her name is Patricia.) Sometimes I don't eat it because I don't want to write it down. I really can't explain how important this is. I have had a great summer but it has busy there where some weeks when I wasn't journaling my food funny those are the weeks I was maintaining and not losing. Started with the journalling and started losing weight again so as Linda says"I have a testimony of food log" Yes yes I do.

Also I don't eat three hours before I go sleep most of the time this is hard for me but I am still doing it most of the time I have not yet perfected this socially yet.

1/3 plate rule make sure one third of your plate is vegetables and for me that means eating those first and if I do go back for seconds it is only for the vegetables.

I have to tell when I started Lifestyles at the clinic it was purely on faith. Follow this and do a min. of 20 min exercise for 5 days a week and you will lose weight. It was pretty crazy but I did it and it worked. Now before I start sounding like an info-mercial. There are a lot of other aspect to permanent weight loss which we will get too. But this is plenty for today. I am a good tired.

I DID IT!!!

Wow I have lost 70 lbs in about 11 mths. That is just crazy to think about. I honestly don't really know what to write I am really happy, excited, proud, all at the same time.

So not only did I hit the goal today but I took it up a notch on my exercise. I have a few things in my head that I would like to accomplish one is a Marathon hence the training for the 1/2 marathon, the other is a triathlon, so there is nothing like today to start working on your dreams. So I biked one mile down the highway and then ran 4 and then biked home. Now just so you don't get the wrong idea a lot of my "biking" was walking beside the bike uphill literally both ways. But I thought it was kind of ironic that I am now to the point where I can run 4 miles without walking at all and yet now I have to walk with my bike instead of riding it. I am always very attracted to things that are a process instead of instant. So much so that I really don't even like instant pudding. I do believe the "INSTANT" is the devil's playground.

"For he will give unto the faithful line upon line, precept upon precept; and I will try you and prove you herewith."
D&C 98:12

I do believe this applies in all aspects of life. Live a full a vivacious life but LIVE IT don't just participate in it. I have to be honest I didn't know how much I was missing a year ago I didn't know that one could be so happy without chocolate. But I am I really really am I wish you could see the sparkle in my eye as I say that. It is a cross between tears, and peace, and perhaps a little bit of my spirit peeking through.

Rest day

Today is a rest day from my running routine I should really be crossing training but today crossing training will probably amount to 7 loads of laundry, 7 loads of dirty dishes, and making 7 loaves of bread. I came across one of my favourite quotes from Pres. Uchtdorf.

"I learned that patience was far more than simply waiting for something to happen—patience required actively working toward worthwhile goals and not getting discouraged when results didn’t appear instantly or without effort.

There is an important concept here: patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!"

I really need to commit this quote to memory. It reminds me while I would like to hit 70lbs this week that I can still be patient in with my self and that does not mean passive resignation it means that I am actively working toward my goal, and not getting discouraged if I don't hit it this week. I know 67lbs worth that what I am doing is going to work so regardless of what the scale says this week I will continue to stay on program.

PS I beat the gummy worms yesterday!! Wahoo!

IDEA

I don't know if I have mention this before but I really love running. There are a lot of reasons why, but one that surprises me is what you think about when you run.
Right now I am training for my first 1/2 Marathon which means I want to finish so I am not paying attention to how fast I am running I just put one foot in front of the other until it is time to stop. This morning that meant 4 miles worth. It was a bit of an odd run I started at 5:30am it had rained heavily the night before and for the first time in a while it was dark outside because the clouds hadn't broke yet. It was oh so beautiful as I ran the sun started to burn off the clouds and poke through, I also noticed the hay cut in curvy straight rows.
I ran my favourite two mile loop. It is my favourite because I know everyone that lives along it, I also remember as a child riding the bus watching a dear old couple hold hands and walk it in the morning. I am amazed at myself I still remember when I ran my first full mile I was delighted. Now I am running four so easily that my mind wonders and I have time to take in the scenery.
So with a wandering mind and pumping legs and arms. I started thinking about how I have been doing with my eating yesterday it was gummy worms, they are not my favourite but I was really hungry after swimming from 12-4. Sunday it was puffed wheat and ritz crackers desert thing, when we were camping it was fresh white bread and butter from a bakery and all of sudden I pictured two thick slices of white bread stuck to my behind so I ran a little faster to get them off. Then there were golden oreos stuck to the underneath of my arms, and puffed wheat stuck to my stomach and I ran a little faster. So I have decided to picture what ever naughty thing I am going to eat stuck somewhere to my body and if I feel ok about it being there I will eat it if not PUT IT DOWN and walk away.

I did however journal all eaten gummy worms which put me over on Carbs yesterday, which makes me what to punch and kick and scream, but today is today, and I am reminded that I really want to hit 70 lbs loss this week, and as one of my friends always says
"I WORKED TO HARD FOR A ___________________ TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO"
You are suppose to fill in the blank with what ever naughty thing you want to eat for example I worked to hard for a gummy worm to tell me what to do. So take that gummy worms I will not falter today.

Crandell Lake

My family hiked to Crandell Lake, it is something I have always wanted to do but haven't. I have had such a year of wonderful "DO's" I feel so blessed.

My eating has been really bad this week I am dreading weigh in but not really because it always keeps me honest, I can do this, I have done it, I can keep doing it.

Do I regret the bad eating no not really, but I also know it doesn't make me feel good like it use too, I don't get the rush out of it like I use to even when I am eating something I don't usually eat meaning treats, or cheese, or white bread, I hear this voice saying yes I am eating this right now but I don't need it anymore, I am eating it right now but this is my OLD LIFE. I have a different life now, and I like my different life. I like the way this body makes me feel and eating this food continually will keep me from having this body and feeling like I do. I DON'T WANT THAT. I love making good food choices, I love eating vegetables, I love eating small portion of healthy food.

Here is one more picture of me at Crandell and another one of my checks or DO'S. YEAH BARB, YEAH ME, GO GO GO, YES FALL DOWN BUT GET BACK UP AND KEEP RUNNING!!!!!!

Inspiration

I love this video. It makes me feel like I am blessed to be losing weight in a robust, fully functioning body. Hope you enjoy it.

8

EIGHT

I have had a week full of great eight things.

Sara turned eight which always a special birthday because she got baptized. We did it at Janisko's teepee the night was incredible no wind not too hot. Seeing such a sacred ceremony performed in such a natural beautiful setting brought the spirit there with great intensity. My whole family was there with most of Jesse's family which meant a lot.

Eight is also the number times I cried yesterday thinking about my parents leaving on a mission some happy, some sad, and some worry. Happy to think that they are doing what the prophet has asked them to do and what our Father in Heaven wants them to do. Happy to see them set such an example for my children. Sad to think I can't call them everyday to complain, ask opinion's and advice. Sad that it is the last time my whole family will be together for the next 18 mths. Worry that I am not as grown up as I would like to think. Worry about the growing I and they will be doing over the next 18 mths. Don't get me wrong I love growing but it is almost always a painful process.

Eight is also the number of miles I ran/slogged(which means a very slow jog) on Saturday morning. It was a very cool morning not any real direct sun a heavy fog. My sister Rita ran with me which made it just plain fun. Eight miles is longer than I have ever ran before it kept a smile on my face for the last two days. It still makes me feel strong but there was not any weight loss this week which is disappointing, but as one of my sisters said "no gain either I would count that as a victory." Which is actually true because I haven't eaten in my home almost all week. Need to get back on track this week and start writing the food I eat down. Which will be this weeks goal to get back to journaling the food.

Bertha Falls

Went hiking to Bertha Falls with people I feel very safe around, it was thoroughly wonderful. I love being in the outdoors, I love Waterton, I loved not feeling exhausted during the hike even though I ran 4 miles that morning. Accomplishing that hike made me feel strong, made me feel like I was putting another support beam in the new house I am building. So far I have lost 66 pounds and yes I am putting it out there. Sometimes I try and lift even 50 pounds from my food storage in the basement and I am amazed at how much that really is. This has been a lot of hard work physically as in changing the way we eat and in so doing the way our life runs, but what surprises me is the amount of mental work that is involved. Being aware of what goes in my mouth, when it goes in, why it is going in, and yes even the how it is going in, is it going in slowly like pouring melted chocolate onto a cookie, or is it being shoved in like your trying to fill a hole that someone else is digging out?

People are starting to notice that I have lost weight and so you always get the "So what are you doing??" I have to say I am not to the point that I like this question yet, but I do feel in raptures when I can tell them that I am training for a 1/2 marathon (September 4,), and I am working with "Linda" at Lifestyles in the Cardston Clinic.

This is me, I love this picture of myself, it was taken at Independence Rock in Wyoming, after a 14 hour drive, I love the way my hair stayed curly, and remembering how happy I was to get out of that stinking vehicle.

BEING FIVE

Being Five by Dennis Lee

I’m not exactly big,

And I’m not exactly little

But being Five is best of all

Because it’s in the middle.

A person likes to ride his bike

Around the block a lot

And being Five is big enough

And being Four is not.

And then he likes to settle down

And suck his thumb a bit,

And being Five is small enough,

But when you’re Six you quit.

I’ve thought about it in my mind -

Being Five, I mean -

And why I like it best of all

Is cause it’s In Between.

I remember my little brother say this poem for festival and always like it. Now that I am 35, I like it even more, 5 is my favourite number, I still remember going to Kindergarten, and Mrs. Payne as my teacher, I remember feeling old and like I was on my way, and feeling confident, and warm and fuzzy.

“OUR DEEPEST FEAR IS NOT THAT WE ARE INADEQUATE. OUR DEEPEST FEAR IS THAT WE ARE POWERFUL BEYOND MEASURE. WE ASK OURSELVES, WHO AM I TO BE BRILLIANT, GORGEOUS, TALENTED, FABULOUS? ACTUALLY, WHO ARE YOU NOT TO BE? WE WERE BORN TO MAKE MANIFEST THE GLORY OF GOD THAT IS WITHIN US. AND AS WE LET OUR OWN LIGHT SHINE, WE UNCONSCIOUSLY GIVE OTHER PEOPLE PERMISSION TO DO THE SAME.”

MARIANNE WILLIAMSON

I love this quote, it reminds me that we are all sent here for a reason, and we are where we are for a purpose.